When both men and women are ever asked about their real sexual fantasies, you’ll find that very few fantasies are uncommon. Many leading studies on the very question of what makes us get a bit sweaty in our palms can be of equally strong sexual preferences. While men and women both fantasize about domination and submission. So what makes you tick… are you normal?
A recent experiment asks a wide range of around 1,500 participating men and women to rate 55 scenarios for their level of likelihood or interest in trying certain fantasies. It was stressed that most of the 55 were not rare or unusual choices.
The participants classified themselves as 85% heterosexual, 3.6% homosexual and the remainder bisexual. The questionnaire asked them to rate their interest level and add an extra fantasy if not on the list. The results were collated and analysed based on the following criteria.
The sexual fantasies offered were defined as following;
- Rare if shared by less than 2.3% of all participants
- Unusual if shared by less than 16%
- Common if shared by over 50%
- Typical if shared by more than 84%
There were only two sexual fantasies that proved rare and these were sex with a child of 12 or less and sex with an animal.
For the unusual sexual fantasies the women chose peeing on their partner, being peed on, being forced to have sex, cross dressing, abusing a drunk person, having sex with a prostitute and having sex with small breasted women.
For the guys the unusual sexual fantasies were peeing on partner, being urinated on, having sex with two other men and having sex with three or more men.
Only five sexual fantasies came up typical:
- Having romantic emotions within a sexual relationship
- Fantasies needing the right location and atmosphere
- Fantasies using romantic locations
- Receiving oral sex
- For men, sex with two female partners
The remaining sexual fantasies showed 23 were common for men, and 11 more were common for women. Both sexes showed up to have a liking for being dominated and med but there were big differences regarding emotional relationships, oral sex, anal sex and sex outside of the relationship.
More interestingly one third of women had fantasized about homosexual fantasies considering that only 19% had expressed themselves as being bisexual or homosexual. Similarly for the men around 25% allowed themselves homosexual fantasies although their applications suggested that only 10% said they weren’t gay.
The ladies it seems were more reluctant to actually live out their fantasies admitting they weren’t too bothered if these fantasies would ever be realised. The scientists tell us that many individuals have unusual fantasies but are happy to keep them well and truly inside their heads. These only ever become pathological if a non-consenting person is involved.
The study did go on to report that the internet was making a big difference to modern tastes. People now readily have access to other individuals or groups that share a taste for a less than common fantasy. This does not prove pathological behaviour however.
So what are the ways we now categorize these fantasises. You may recognise a few but there are still some strange ones none-the-less.
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (Fourth edition) or DSM-IV-TR describes these following paraphilias;
- Fetishism – the use of non-sexual or non-living objects or can be a part of a person’s body used to gain sexual excitement or gratification. Partialism refers to the fetishes that specifically involve only non-sexual parts of the body.
- Masochism – a recurring urge or behavioural pattern of wanting to feel or be humiliated, bound, beaten or in any other way made to suffer
- Sadism – a recurring urge or behavioural pattern that involves acts in which pain or humiliation of a victim feels sexually exciting.
- Exhibitionism – a recurring urge or behavioural pattern to expose the genitals to an unsuspecting person.
- Voyeurism – a recurring urge or behavioural pattern of observing an unsuspecting person who is naked, or disrobing or engaging in sexual activities or could even be not sexually related at all.
- Frotteurism – a recurring urge or behavioural pattern of touching or rubbing up against the body of a non-consenting person.
- Transvestite Fetishism – the sexual attraction towards clothing of the opposite gender.
- Chronophilias such as infantophilia is the sexual attraction to infants.
- Pedophilia is the sexual attraction to prepubescent children.
- Gerontophilia is the sexual attraction to the elderly.
There are other paraphilias including problematical behaviours such as telephone scatalogia which basically means making obscene phone calls. Necrophilia for corpses, zoophilia for animals, coprophilia for feces, urophilia for urine, klismaphilia for enemas and partualism which focusses exclusively on one part of the body.
Just as a side note homosexuality both gay and lesbianism was formerly recorded as a paraphilia in the DSM I and II, but this has since been declassified from both DSM III and IV. This is to be seen as consistent to fall in line with the modern change of attitudes amongst psychiatrists and psychologists. Homosexuality is therefore no longer considered a paraphilia.
Here are some more of the weird and wonderful ones. It’s all true.
- Abasiophilia – love of or sexual attraction to people in leg braces and such.
- Acrotomophilia – love of or sexual attraction of amputees.
- Agalmatophilia – love of or sexual attraction of statues or mannequins.
- Algolagnia – sexual pleasure from pain.
- Amaurophilia – sexual arousal due to sensory deprivation.
- Apotemnophilia – desire to have healthy limbs and digits or genitals amputated.
- Aretifism – sexual attraction to shoeless people.
- Asphyxiophalia – sexual attraction to asphyxia.
- Biastophilia – sexual pleasure from committing rape.
- Crush fetish – sexual arousal from watching a partner crush small animals.
- Dacryphilia – sexual pleasure from having or seeing tears.
- Diaper fetish – sexual arousal from diapers
- Emetophilia – sexual attraction to vomit.
- Eproctophilia – sexual attraction to flatulence.
- Galactophilia – sexual attraction to lactating women.
- Haematophilia – sexual attraction involving blood.
- Harpaxophilia – sexual arousal from being a robbery victim.
- Hematognia – sexual attraction to blood.
- Hybristophilia – sexual arousal to people who have committed outrageous crimes.
- Katoptronophilia – sexual arousal from sexual intercourse in front of mirrors.
- Infantilism – sexual pleasure from dressing and acting like a baby.
- Mysophilia – sexual attraction to soiled and foul material.
- Necrozoophilia – sexual actraction to animals being killed.
- Phalloorchoalgolagnia – sexual arousal due to pain stimuli on male genitals.
- Plushopia – sexual attraction to stuffed toys and people in animal costumes.
- Retifism – sexual arousal over shoes.
- Schediaphilia – sexual arousal over cartoon characters.
- Sitophilia – sexual arousal from food.
- Somnophilia – sexual arousal over sleeping people.
- Spectrophilia – sexual attraction to ghosts.
- Teratophilia – sexual attraction to deformed and monstrous people.
- Transformation fetish – sexual arousal from transformations of people into other things.
- Trichophilia – sexual arousal from hair.
- Vorarephilia – sexual attraction from someone being eaten by a creature.
- Xenophilia – sexual attraction to foreigners and aliens.